Preparing for A to Z, but Living From A to B

Audio By Carbonatix

Most of us have a difficult time living in the present. Too often, we dwell in the past or spend time trying to predict the future. The present gets lost somewhere between.

That’s especially true when it comes to parenting our children. We tend to live in the present, but we parent in the future. We jump ahead of ourselves because we are so desperate to see how our children are going to “turn out.” We attempt to do that by pushing ourselves and our kids to live in a frenzy of daily activities and impatiently wanting immediate results from our efforts. We focus on our vision for their lives and may even forget to consider their dreams. While it is necessary to be practical and prepare for the future (such as our children’s education) and plan financially to meet basic human needs, we have to try to live just one day at a time, or we will miss the entire journey. Our kids will be ready to move out and we will wonder what happened to the time and we will wonder how we missed so much.

Living in the moment means slowing down the pace. Instead of running through each day, checking off task after task until right before bed, find time during the day to relax. Try to stop scheduling so many activities. That’s hard, because busyness is celebrated in this culture. Obviously, that’s necessary sometimes, but look at your calendar and see how often it occurs. As your kids grow older, start asking them what they see for their future and keep that on your radar. Yes, they might change their minds over the years, but let them know that they have a say in what happens. I’ve known children who have been afraid to tell their parents their dreams because they knew their hopes and dreams weren’t what their parents wanted for them. Young adults have pursued the wrong major in college because they chose the path their parents laid out for them instead of their own path. There are parents who are so occupied with the day-to-day flow of life that they don’t see who their children are becoming.

In order to prepare for A to Z, but live from A to B, you might consider making time each night to reflect for a few minutes on what happened during the day. Ask your children a question or two about what was good or not so good about their day. Make sure you find one-on-one time periodically with your children to see what is going on. If you are sincere, even the kids that are reluctant to open up will eventually come around.

It’s appropriate to look ahead and plan for the future, but do so while you keep your eye on today. When you do, you will win more often at home.