What Are You Gonna Do with Your Life?

Guest (Female): And now Adventures in Odyssey.
Connie Kendall: Oh, you missed a section, Jason.
Jason Whittaker: Huh?
Connie Kendall: That corner next to the register.
Jason Whittaker: Oh, thanks. This is a beautiful old counter, isn't it? I wonder where Dad got it.
Connie Kendall: Well, I don't know. I never thought to ask him.
Jason Whittaker: Probably an old diner or soda shop somewhere. Dad's always had a knack for finding off-the-wall stuff. Our basement was full of things he picked up at garage sales or close-outs or auctions. Things nobody in their right mind would want. But he had a way of turning them into something valuable.
Connie Kendall: Kind of like he did with Whit's End. It was a condemned building until he got his hands on it.
Jason Whittaker: Yeah, that's right. You know, I guess it's a gift of his: the ability to take things and turn them into something good. In a way, Dad's whole life's been dedicated to that. It's probably what drove him to teach and open Whit's End and take over that old archaeological mission.
Connie Kendall: Do you think your dad was always like that, or did he sort of become that way?
Jason Whittaker: I don't know.
Connie Kendall: I mean, do you think one day he just woke up and decided that he would work to make things better by being a teacher or whatever?
Jason Whittaker: What are you asking me, Connie?
Connie Kendall: Well, like how about you? How did you decide what you wanted to do with your life?
Jason Whittaker: I'm not sure I ever really decided. For me, it seemed like circumstances just sort of took me in certain directions. Why? Are you trying to make a decision about something?
Connie Kendall: Only my life, that's all.
Jason Whittaker: Oh.
Connie Kendall: I'm going to be finished with high school soon and everybody's talking about what they're going to do: college, careers. I don't have a clue.
Jason Whittaker: I thought you were going to be a teacher.
Connie Kendall: I thought so too, but now I'm not sure. I'm just trying to figure it out. It seems like I should know by now.
Eugene Meltsner: Know what by now, Miss Kendall? The dishes are put away, Jason.
Jason Whittaker: Thanks, Eugene. Connie's trying to decide what she wants to do with her life.
Eugene Meltsner: Hmm.
Connie Kendall: Hmm? What's that mean, hmm?
Eugene Meltsner: Well, it means that any response from me would be inappropriate at this time.
Connie Kendall: Oh really? Why? You have something sarcastic to say about what I should do with my life?
Eugene Meltsner: Let's not be defensive, Miss Kendall. The only reason I can't respond is that I simply don't really relate to your dilemma.
Connie Kendall: I suppose you've always known what you wanted to be when you grew up.
Eugene Meltsner: Indeed.
Connie Kendall: Yeah right. I can see it now: Eugene in his little playpen with a telescope in one hand and a chemistry set in the other.
Eugene Meltsner: Don't be absurd. It was a microscope and a small blackboard and chalk so I could do my physics equations.
Jason Whittaker: Oh, come on.
Eugene Meltsner: Now don't be jealous. Some people know early on what their interests are, and that naturally leads them to what their careers will be. I am a case in point.
Connie Kendall: Well, you're a case all right.
Eugene Meltsner: Thank you.
Jason Whittaker: It's a fair statement, Connie. Interests often lead to careers.
Connie Kendall: Interests, huh?
Jason Whittaker: Sure. What do you like to do?
Connie Kendall: Shop.
Connie Kendall: Thanks a lot for letting me come in like this, Mrs. Clydesdale.
Mrs. Clydesdale: Connie, I can't tell you how impressed I am at your initiative. Not many young people today would do what you're doing: looking to the future, exploring opportunities.
Connie Kendall: Well, thank you. It's just that I figured since I liked to shop that working at a department store might be a possible career.
Mrs. Clydesdale: And that's smart thinking, too. That's how I got started 22 years ago. Worked myself up from an inventory clerk to head of the perfume counter.
Connie Kendall: So where do we start?
Mrs. Clydesdale: Well, you read the brochures I gave you about the perfumes, correct? Now all you need are some customers, and I believe we have some approaching now. I'll help the woman in the blue hat and you assist that gentleman.
Connie Kendall: Okay. Hi. May I help you?
Guest (Male): Yeah, I'm looking for some perfume for my wife. It's her birthday.
Connie Kendall: Oh, how nice. And how thoughtful of you to think of perfume. Does she have a favorite?
Guest (Male): Yeah, but it makes me break out in hives. I want to find something else.
Connie Kendall: Well, we believe in matching the right perfume to the right person. What is your wife like?
Guest (Male): I don't know, average.
Connie Kendall: Average?
Guest (Male): You know, average height, weight, build, blonde hair, one leg shorter than the other.
Connie Kendall: What I mean is what's her personality like? Is she bold and adventurous or shy and demure?
Guest (Male): Both. On our bowling night, she's a tiger. The rest of the time, she could care less. I think she'd like that stuff there. What's that called? Nightcrawler Number 7.
Connie Kendall: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You don't want that.
Guest (Male): I don't? Why not?
Connie Kendall: Well, Nightcrawler is a very rich, sophisticated scent for a woman to wear to classical music concerts or an evening out at galleries.
Guest (Male): What are you saying? My wife isn't sophisticated?
Connie Kendall: No, not at all. What I mean is that it isn't the kind of perfume a woman should wear for bowling night.
Guest (Male): Well, what kind of perfume should a woman wear for bowling night?
Connie Kendall: Well, I think this one is nice: Château d'Ox.
Guest (Male): Fine. I think I'll go with the Nightcrawler, please.
Connie Kendall: And I think you're making a big mistake. We have some wonderful Erudite just over here, a modest scent with just a hint of mischief.
Guest (Male): My wife isn't mischievous.
Connie Kendall: How about some of this? Lingering Suspicion.
Guest (Male): Not interested.
Connie Kendall: Well, I think you really should...
Guest (Male): Watch my lips: I want the Nightcrawler.
Connie Kendall: Look, sir, you have to trust me. I know about these things. I'm a woman, and the thing you want...
Guest (Male): You're not a woman; you're a counter girl. And I think I know what my wife will like better than you.
Connie Kendall: Fine. The customer is always right. You want Nightcrawler Number 7, then take it. But don't come running back to me when your wife thinks you've lost your sense of smell and taste.
Guest (Male): Perhaps it would be better if I didn't purchase anything here at all.
Connie Kendall: That, of course, is your decision.
Mrs. Clydesdale: Pardon me. Is there a problem here?
Connie Kendall: No, no problem. This gentleman was just making a disastrous decision, that's all.
Guest (Male): What? No, I'm making a very smart decision. I've decided never to shop here again. Imagine buying Nightcrawler for bowling.
Mrs. Clydesdale: Now, Connie, please try to understand.
Connie Kendall: I understand completely. I'm a terrible salesperson.
Mrs. Clydesdale: Now, you aren't terrible per se. Every sales clerk makes mistakes on their first day, and some people aren't suited to this kind of work at all.
Connie Kendall: Okay, Mrs. Clydesdale, I can take a hint. Maybe selling isn't such a good career choice for me. But thanks for giving me a chance.
Mrs. Clydesdale: If only to give you direction for the future, you're welcome. Though, Connie, your interests aren't always the best guide to your life's vocation.
Connie Kendall: They aren't? Well then, what is?
Mrs. Clydesdale: What are you skilled at?
Connie Kendall: I'll have to think about that.
Mrs. Clydesdale: Please do. It might give you some new inspiration. Bye-bye.
Connie Kendall: Give me direction for the future. What am I going to do now?
Harlo Doyle: Excuse me, young lady, but may I have a word?
Connie Kendall: Harlo Doyle! What are you doing here?
Harlo Doyle: Detective Doyle, if you please.
Connie Kendall: Oh, are you on a case?
Harlo Doyle: Am I on a case? Am I on a case? Am I on a case?
Connie Kendall: Are you?
Harlo Doyle: No. I'm working as an undercover security guard.
Connie Kendall: Really? Where?
Harlo Doyle: In the bedding and sheets department. Where else would I work undercover? Silly question. I was doing plain clothes in the women's department, but looked silly in high heels.
Connie Kendall: So can I go now?
Harlo Doyle: Sure, as long as I can go now, too. Say, what were you doing here anyway?
Connie Kendall: Trying to figure out what to do with my life.
Harlo Doyle: In a department store? Boy, they have everything, don't they?
Connie Kendall: First I thought I'd try something I was interested in. That didn't work.
Harlo Doyle: Of course not.
Connie Kendall: Now Mrs. Clydesdale said I should think about my skills. But what am I skilled at?
Harlo Doyle: Good question. Are you any good with jackhammers?
Connie Kendall: No. Why do you ask?
Harlo Doyle: Just wondering. I know! How about secretarial work?
Connie Kendall: You mean like filing and mailing letters and answering phones and stuff like that?
Harlo Doyle: No, I mean secretarial work. Meaning that I need a secretary. My last one had a nervous breakdown. Are you interested?
Connie Kendall: In having a nervous breakdown?
Harlo Doyle: If it'll help you do the job, sure. I think you'd make a terrific secretary.
Connie Kendall: Well, I don't suppose it would hurt to try.
Harlo Doyle: You have no idea how much it'll hurt. When can you start?
Connie Kendall: Wow, so this is your office.
Harlo Doyle: Yeah, not bad, huh?
Connie Kendall: That's unusual in a cozy sort of way. Is that raccoon real?
Harlo Doyle: I'd hardly bother to stuff a fake one. Now, the desk and the phone are self-explanatory. You sit at one and perhaps talk on the other. This plastic whirly thing has paper clips, rubber bands, and a stock of gum. Do you chew gum?
Connie Kendall: Sometimes.
Harlo Doyle: Chewing gum is a must for a private detective secretary, and chew loudly. It's what people expect.
Connie Kendall: You're kidding.
Harlo Doyle: Now, let's see how you do with dictation.
Connie Kendall: Oh, okay. Where's a pen and a pad of paper?
Harlo Doyle: I have them right here in my coat pocket. Standard equipment. There we go. Now, start.
Connie Kendall: Me? Aren't you going to give me the pen and paper?
Harlo Doyle: Why would I do that? It's my letter.
Connie Kendall: But dictation is when you tell me what you want in the letter and I write it down for you.
Harlo Doyle: You're kidding. My last secretary made me write everything down. No wonder the spelling was so atrocious.
Connie Kendall: Oh boy.
Harlo Doyle: Okay, enough with this training. I think we should get to work.
Connie Kendall: All right. What do you want me to do?
Harlo Doyle: Well, answer the phone when it rings, and if it's for me, then let me know who it is. And if someone comes to the door, let them in.
Connie Kendall: Sure.
Harlo Doyle: Then let's get started!
Connie Kendall: Harlo!
Harlo Doyle: Wait, Connie! I'm just about to break this case!
Connie Kendall: You've been working on a case?
Harlo Doyle: Uh-huh. My briefcase. The lock jammed and I can't get the thing opened. There we go. Now I can eat my breakfast.
Connie Kendall: It's nearly time for dinner.
Harlo Doyle: Hey, you can eat Pop-Tarts any time of the day. Want one?
Connie Kendall: No thanks. I was thinking that maybe you don't really need a secretary right now.
Harlo Doyle: I don't?
Connie Kendall: I mean, the phone hasn't rung all day and frankly there's nothing to do.
Harlo Doyle: Nothing to do? Well, what about fingernail filing and chewing gum?
Connie Kendall: I'm down to my knuckles and my jaws hurt.
Harlo Doyle: I catch you loud and clear. The job's a little too demanding, too high pressure. Not everyone's cut out for it.
Connie Kendall: No, and I guess I'm not.
Harlo Doyle: Well, don't feel like you're a failure, Connie. It's not a job I'd be any good at either.
Connie Kendall: Well, that's a real comfort. Thanks.
Harlo Doyle: You're welcome. Do you want me to lock up on my way out? Better not. Last time my secretary did that I was stuck in here for three days. Right. Four days.
Eugene Meltsner: Greetings, Connie.
Connie Kendall: Hi, Eugene.
Eugene Meltsner: Oh, I assume by your tone that the career search isn't going well.
Connie Kendall: Not at all. Does the phrase wild goose chase mean anything to you?
Eugene Meltsner: Only in relationship to rare tribal agricultural rituals.
Connie Kendall: Oh. Well anyway, I'm no closer now to knowing what I want to do than I was this morning.
Eugene Meltsner: Then I may have something that'll help you.
Connie Kendall: Like what?
Eugene Meltsner: A personality test.
Connie Kendall: You're setting me up.
Eugene Meltsner: I am not. This is a bona fide test to help people determine what kind of personality they have in conjunction with aptitude. It's simple really. I ask you certain questions which you'll answer objectively to the best of your ability. Then we'll ascribe numerical points to your answers in relationship to similar answers given by a cross-section of people around the country. Averaging those points against the national average will place your total on a personality curve of plus or minus five, which will then tell us what kind of person you are and in what vocation you'll be best suited.
Connie Kendall: You're right. It is simple.
Eugene Meltsner: First question: if a train leaves the depot at 3:00, traveling south at six miles per hour against a northwesterly wind of 30 miles per hour and has only 65% of its weight capacity on board, what color would you paint the train?
Connie Kendall: What color would I... is that really what it wants to know?
Eugene Meltsner: Indeed.
Connie Kendall: Well, I guess I'd paint the train blue. This makes no sense.
Eugene Meltsner: Blue. Next question: if you were a cat and could chase a dog, a mouse, or a bird, which would you chase first?
Connie Kendall: A dog.
Eugene Meltsner: Very telling.
Connie Kendall: Is it?
Eugene Meltsner: Please, we must carry on.
Connie Kendall: How many questions are there?
Eugene Meltsner: Oh, 112.
Connie Kendall: What?
Eugene Meltsner: Stay with me, Connie. It's for your own good.
Connie Kendall: All right, go on.
Eugene Meltsner: Finish this thought: a tomato is to a mailbox what a wingback chair is to a... Blank. On a scale from one to ten, how would you rate the Kennedy administration?
Connie Kendall: Well, what's my score?
Eugene Meltsner: Patience, please.
Connie Kendall: Come on, Eugene, you've been playing with those numbers for half an hour.
Eugene Meltsner: Well, I just wanted to make sure I got them right.
Connie Kendall: And?
Eugene Meltsner: Oh, this is terribly disturbing, Miss Kendall.
Connie Kendall: Why? What's wrong?
Eugene Meltsner: Well, according to this, your score is in a negative 26 percentile.
Connie Kendall: What's that mean?
Eugene Meltsner: Well, you have no personality whatsoever, and as far as jobs are concerned, are suited only to gluing corrugation to cardboard boxes.
Connie Kendall: What? I don't... let me see that! You mean I spent the last hour and a half for that? It's ridiculous! Who came up with this cockamamie test?
Eugene Meltsner: Well, actually, I did. I've been waiting for months to try it out on someone.
Connie Kendall: Well, try it out on the trash can, Eugene!
Eugene Meltsner: Honestly, Connie, assembling cardboard boxes can be quite gratifying as a line of work.
Connie Kendall: Oh, just leave me alone!
Eugene Meltsner: Perhaps I should try this test on someone else.
Tom Riley: Morning, Connie.
Connie Kendall: Morning, Tom. Oh, the coffee's fresh.
Tom Riley: Thank you. Are you here all by yourself this morning?
Connie Kendall: Yeah, it's just me and my dishes. One of the few things I know how to do.
Tom Riley: What's that mean?
Connie Kendall: Means that I don't know what to do with my life.
Tom Riley: Is that something you're trying to figure out this morning?
Connie Kendall: Yeah. Well, this morning and yesterday.
Tom Riley: Oh. Well, you know it takes some people years to figure out what they want to do with their life.
Connie Kendall: Not you, I bet.
Tom Riley: Well, no. My daddy was a doctor, but somewhere early on it was understood that I'd take care of the farm and the horses.
Connie Kendall: So you're like Eugene.
Tom Riley: I never wanted to think so.
Connie Kendall: Well, what I mean is you knew at an early age what you were going to do.
Tom Riley: Yeah, I did.
Connie Kendall: And Jason figured out what he wanted to do because of a combination of his interests and, what'd he say, circumstances.
Tom Riley: I guess it works that way, too.
Connie Kendall: Well, it's not working for me. I'll probably be a dishwasher at Whit's End for the rest of my life.
Tom Riley: Is that so bad?
Connie Kendall: No, I guess not. At least it's something I like to do.
Tom Riley: Well, that counts for something, I hope.
Connie Kendall: Yeah. Yeah, it does. Oops. Now why can't this thing leave me alone?
Connie Kendall: What is it?
Tom Riley: My pager. Oh, well, they want me down at the office. I'll be glad when my time as mayor runs out so I can get back to my life.
Connie Kendall: Well, thanks for stopping by, Tom. You've given me a good idea.
Tom Riley: Have I? Well, good. Look, Connie, why don't you come by the farm later today? I think this is a conversation we need to finish.
Connie Kendall: Yeah, maybe. I'll see you.
Tom Riley: Bye.
Connie Kendall: Maybe the answer was right under my nose. Whit's End can be my career.
Eugene Meltsner: All right, thank you, Jason. I'll get the results back to you shortly.
Jason Whittaker: Great. Interesting test, Eugene. So have you seen Connie today?
Eugene Meltsner: After I arrived this morning, she disappeared to the office. I believe the word surprise was muttered as she walked away.
Jason Whittaker: Uh-oh. I wonder what she's up to.
Guest (Male): Hello! Delivery here!
Jason Whittaker: Delivery?
Guest (Male): I'm at the counter. Did you order something?
Jason Whittaker: Not I.
Guest (Male): Hi, I'm from Smith's Supplies. I just need to sign right here and I'll bring it on in.
Jason Whittaker: Bring what in? I didn't order anything.
Guest (Male): Somebody ordered a truckload of napkins.
Jason Whittaker: A truckload?
Guest (Male): Yeah, the phone order from Connie Kendall.
Jason Whittaker: Connie? What in the world...
Guest (Male): Oh, hi, are you Jason Whittaker?
Jason Whittaker: Yeah.
Guest (Male): I'm with Steinway Grocers. Should I pull my truck around back or bring the boxes through the front?
Jason Whittaker: Boxes of what?
Guest (Male): Ice cream, ice cream cones, and let's see, three crates of prunes.
Jason Whittaker: Prunes?
Guest (Male): Look, I'm on a tight deadline. Are you going to sign for these napkins or what?
Jason Whittaker: Yeah, hold on.
Connie Kendall: Jason! Eugene! Ta-da!
Jason Whittaker: Connie, what's going on here?
Connie Kendall: What?
Jason Whittaker: Listen, did you order a truckload of napkins?
Connie Kendall: A truckload? No, I only ordered a... what's on the form... a shipment.
Guest (Male): A shipment is a truckload, lady.
Connie Kendall: Oops. My mistake.
Jason Whittaker: Well, how about ice cream and cones and prunes?
Connie Kendall: Prunes? Why would I order prunes? I asked for peaches.
Guest (Male): Sorry, but we got the order by fax, and if you look right here, you asked for three crates of XJ7736, which are prunes.
Connie Kendall: Let me see that. Oh, I meant to ask for XK7735. My fingers must have hit the wrong keys. Sorry.
Guest (Male): Sure did. Oh boy.
Jason Whittaker: Look, guys, we obviously have a mistake here. So could we cancel these orders until I can sort this out?
Guest (Male): You want to cancel? Do you know how far I drove to bring these napkins?
Jason Whittaker: I know, I know. Have some coffee. This will just take a minute. Eugene, get them some coffee.
Eugene Meltsner: Aye, sir.
Jason Whittaker: Connie, could I see you in the office, please?
Connie Kendall: If you insist.
Tom Riley: Whoa now, whoa, Rachel.
Connie Kendall: I just feel so stupid, Tom.
Tom Riley: Now don't be too hard on yourself. You obviously got all worked up about choosing a career and things got out of hand. I had a feeling something like this might happen. That's why I wanted you to come over.
Connie Kendall: It just seems like I should know by now what I want to do. My teachers and guidance counselors at school are talking about it: what's my major going to be at college? What kind of job do I want?
Tom Riley: Well, those decisions have to be made, I guess, just to plan for the immediate future. But not everybody's on the same timetable as the school system.
Connie Kendall: But all my friends know what they want to do.
Tom Riley: But that doesn't mean you have to be on the same timetable as them either. We're all different, Connie.
Connie Kendall: No, I'm the different one. By the time you were my age, you knew what you wanted to do. So did Eugene. Even Jason had it figured out.
Tom Riley: Well, maybe we did, maybe we didn't. My guess is if you sat us all down, you'd see that we all came to our decisions in different ways. Now for Eugene, it was probably based on Eugene being, well, so Eugene. For me, it was my love of farming, to be sure, but it was also the thing I needed to do. My father's practice took him away from the family business; somebody needed to do it and I was the likely candidate to take it on. For Jason, I happen to know it was a combination of his interests and his father's influence. All different, you see.
Connie Kendall: Yeah, I see.
Tom Riley: Except for one thing: in one way or another, we all went through a process to make up our minds.
Connie Kendall: What do you mean?
Tom Riley: Well, let me try to make sense of it. Decisions can be based on personality and circumstances and influence, and you know for a lot of people, it's just a matter of finding a job that'll pay the bills. There's nothing wrong with that. But most everybody goes through a process to figure out their strengths and weaknesses, their skills, their gifts. One key difference though.
Connie Kendall: What?
Tom Riley: For us Christians, I expect we're also listening for God's calling. I assume you've been praying about all this to see what God is calling you to do. The point is, don't panic. Don't rush. Don't get yourself all tied up in knots today making a decision about a lifetime career. Play around with it. Give yourself time to explore the possibilities. There I go sounding like I'm making a speech.
Connie Kendall: Well, you're good at it.
Tom Riley: I guess I'm just saying to keep your eyes and ears open, and God will help you work it out. Okay?
Connie Kendall: Yeah. Thanks, Tom.
Tom Riley: You're welcome. Now, there's one thing you could decide to do right this minute.
Connie Kendall: What?
Tom Riley: Grab that brush and take care of Leah over there. I think she's feeling a little neglected.
Connie Kendall: That I can do.
Eugene Meltsner: Obviously my test needs work. Not only did it have you working in box manufacturing, but it suggested that Jason's personality was best suited for painting figurines of cartoon characters in Korea.
Connie Kendall: I don't think he'd have the patience for that.
Eugene Meltsner: Precisely. I believe I'm back at the proverbial starting gate.
Connie Kendall: Well, maybe creating tests isn't your calling, Eugene.
Eugene Meltsner: Perhaps it isn't. Hmm.
Connie Kendall: What?
Eugene Meltsner: Well, strangely, as a result of your quest to discern your life's goals, I've been rethinking mine.
Connie Kendall: You have?
Eugene Meltsner: All my life I've operated on some basic assumptions about who I am and what I should be doing. But now that I'm a Christian, many of those assumptions can and should be challenged. Reconsidering the overall direction of my life may be a good thing to do. So perhaps while you're figuring yours out, you're welcome to tag along if you want, Eugene. I'd appreciate the company. Anyway, two are better than one.
Eugene Meltsner: Well, thank you, Connie. But I have a few questions first.
Connie Kendall: Oh?
Eugene Meltsner: If you're on a blue train at 2:00 in the afternoon and a giant tomato hits it at a 45-degree angle, what would you say on a scale from one to ten?
Connie Kendall: A truckload of prunes!
Eugene Meltsner: Okay. Welcome to the figure-out-your-life club.
Connie Kendall: Thank you.
Chris: God says in Isaiah 42:16, "I will lead them in paths that they have not known. I will make darkness light before them, and crooked things straight. These things will I do unto them, and not forsake them." That's just one verse among many in the Bible assuring us that God cares about all the decisions we make. Whether we're trying to figure out what to do with our lives or just trying to sort out our plans for the day, God is with us and wants us to consider his desires in what we decide. So what do you think God wants you to do? I'm glad you joined us for this important episode, and we'll have to see what happens with Connie and Eugene in the adventures to come. Meanwhile, feel free to write us about, well, anything you have in mind. Our address is Adventures in Odyssey, Colorado Springs, Colorado 80995. Or in Canada write to Box 9800, Vancouver, BC, V6B 4G3. And don't forget to ask about how you can get your own copy of today's episode. It's called What Are You Gonna Do with Your Life? Adventures in Odyssey is a presentation of Focus on the Family. What Are You Gonna Do with Your Life? was written and directed by Paul McCusker. Our production engineer was Dave Arnold, and our executive producer is Chuck Bolte. And I'm Chris, hoping you'll join us again next time for more Adventures in Odyssey.